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For all parents there comes a time in our lives that our children are maturing and developing into adulthood. This is a challenging time as well as an exciting time. We, as parents, have experience and we want to lend a gentle hand of guidance and offer the security that our children still need, although apparently they may not perceive our gestures in the light that they were intended.

Our maturing children are entering this new stage of life with their eyes wide open. They are ready and willing to grab hold of opportunities as well as take gambles with relative ease. They will learn valuable lessons because of this attitude. As parents, we support them. We offer advice although subjective in nature and in a gentle fashion, and we guide them along their venture as best we can. They are open to everything although it may not appear this way and everything we say and do provide them with something of significance even though they may seem reluctant on the surface.

It can be a difficult as a parent to stand by their side giving support to their plans and dreams as we know that this journey will be a challenging one. It is wise to offer advice and then step back to allow them to digest as insistence on our part will only be met with frustration and aggression. In many cases, at this age they are head strong and will follow their own judgement and will advance in their chosen direction regardless of our input, so we have to know when to let go and step aside.

As far as assistance and we are primarily speaking of financial assistance right now, we can help when necessary but hopefully the ground work of responsibility was laid long ago. With ground work in place, we step back and trust in the lessons already taught.

If they acknowledge and are appreciative that we have provided them with loving support through guiding step or financial support to make life easier than our gestures are not in vain. If on the contrary they waste this opportunity and squander our efforts then we will know better when the next time arrives, as under these circumstances they undoubtedly will. There are always times to help and then it is important to recognize that there are times when our financial generosity is not helpful; it is actually detrimental to their maturation and development of self-reliance.

When these young individuals meet up with life’s challenges which you know they will, the best we can do is offer our emotional support and guidance and then stick with them through thick and thin regardless of their decision. They need emotional support during these trying times and we are well equipped to assist them in this manner for no one loves them more. When they make mistakes and take what we consider wrong turns in life, they need our emotional support even more, but we also have to keep in mind the workings of the universe and that things happen for a reason. The school of hard knocks always has their best interests at heart.

You do however have to know when the time is right to stop subsidising their finances and let them stand on their own two feet. Let them take life by the horns and run with it. What great lessons these are in self-sufficiency, confidence, etc.

Being a parent and offering loving support never ends and our children have to know that they can always depend on us for this type of support. Whatever you felt was missing in your youth can now be utilized with mature insight and worldly education. We have all walked similar roads to that which are growing children now venture. Support them every step of the way but let them be responsible for themselves and their actions.


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