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Life at times can present us with challenges that seem to steal our focus and we, for some reason, allow ourselves to feel stagnating and point the finger at the challenges. For some, they may even question their self-worth. We can be confronted with what feels to be massive, overwhelming tests that come at us from every angle. With the deepest life lessons, we are seldom prepared for the events.

In hindsight, upon review, our reactions are not always what we might have wanted them to be.

For some of us, this seems to be a reoccurring theme in life. When we are faced with adversity and difficult conditions, we often meet these lessons with opposition. We sometimes feel as though we are victims of life but are we?

Are we not actually victims of our own reactions to life’s events?

Life is going to happen, with or without our consent. If we view these events as lessons, we can face life head on and use the events to grow and learn. We can recognize that these events are not a part of us. We do not have to own what has taken place.

Alternatively, we can meet life’s events with frustration, “why me” and anger which in turn will turn a lesson into a very difficult lesson. We can take this very hard lesson one step further and own what has happened and see it as a part of who we are. But why would we do this? What would be the benefit of this?

How do we change an event that has already happened? It has happened and we cannot turn back the hands of time.

We always have a choice on how we deal with adversity.

Also, we have a choice on how long we choose to hang on to the events. If we try to sweep them under the carpet, they do not disappear. Guaranteed they will resurface again. If we try to ignore them, we are actually giving them energy by working on ignoring. How much time and control are we willing to give to these uncontrollable events?

This is not to say that we are unaffected by what takes place even if we do not fight the event. This does not mean that we are not emotionally affected by life’s events nor does it mean that we are cold or unemotional in any way. What it does mean is that life happens and we have options in what ways we move forward. There are always choices to be made. We are not at the mercy of these events as many believe. We are always at the helm of our reactions and our emotions. We alone dictate how we will allow ourselves to be affected by each and every event in life.

Events in life WILL happen without our consent, but we have choices as to how we will allow ourselves to be affected. We make those choices whether those decisions are conscious or not.

If we choose to analyse our decisions and recognize our part in the process, we learn how to adjust to life’s events rather than feeling as though we are a victim of them. Being familiar with our past reactions and decision helps us to learn to control our next decision. We can put strategies in place so that we make well, thought-out choices instead of making “reaction”. We want to be mindful in order to make wise decisions not react to a situation and then have regrets.

Learn to listen to the quiet inner guide. When something happens, feel the human feelings, but take a breath and allow yourself the time to be mindful. If it is a life lesson you are faced with, see it as that and learn. If we ignore the lesson, it will only come back at us even harder the next time.

Stop, process and then act with intension. Stand tall in the face of adversity by recognizing the lesson. It is not who you are and is not yours to “set up house” in. It is a temporary lesson to help you grow. Move forward with the benefit of that knowledge.

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