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The need for our own personal space and yet the need to be close is often a personal dilemma shared by many.

We all need and want to be loved and appreciated. We expand in the warmth of loved shared. We also, however, need our own personal space and the ability to move in whatever direction we see fit.

Many couples are confronted with this paradox.

Are you being smothered in a tight and loving relationship? Do you feel as though you are being cornered or contained because of this? Or are you without a personal relationship and wish you were in one but at the same time like your freedom?

Being single or in an open relationship means that you can do what you want when you want without having answer to anyone but yourself. This is preferred by some but offers insecurity and possibliy loneliness for others.

Being in a close personal relationship means sharing our lives with someone we love and never feeling alone. However there will be days when we need our own space and the demands of our partner may be trying.

In a perfect world, we have a balance of both and it is achievable as long as there is give and take on both sides. Finding someone who gives us space to live our life without obligations is pretty rare, yet if we truly love someone, we don’t mind giving up a little personal freedom in order to share. Is true love not unconditional?

It is essential that we are open and communication with our partner if we have chose to share this life with someone. It is important to discuss our own personal needs, so that others know what we are experiencing. Just as important, we should allow our partner to be open with us and respect what they need. A partnership is equal give and take without keeping tabs.

Spend a few minutes each day in quiet solitude even if only for a short walk, a quiet shower or a quiet meditation. These little practices can provide personal space.

On the other side of the coin, create special moments together such as a romantic dinner without the television or telephone interrupting. Take a stroll through a park hand in hand.

We can even take care of both needs….why not meditate together holding hands. The mind has its personal space but the knowing of love can fill our heart.

One thing is for certain, other people’s needs are important but so are our own; talk it out.

What do you do to satisfy your need for personal private time yet sharing your time lovingly with your partner/children/parents?

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